When I was a child, I thought to myself, "When I grow up I am going to have it all". Then I got married, married, and married. Somewhere between 1965 and 1998 I had three children whom I tried to raise well in the middle of messed up relationships, marriages, and my own great discontent. Then when I couldn't take anymore I completely ran away emotionally. After everything started 'leaking out', I realized I must finally run away physically. I did that, and within the year I was lucky enough to find my way into a marriage that proved to be; all a good relationship is supposed to be. This time I was treated well in all respects and life was almost perfect and quite lovely at 50. If you ever think life is ever going to be completely perfect; then you are deluding yourself.
This went on for almost three years until just after I turned 53. The love of my life found out he had cancer and died within 3 months. I tried to stay where I was but the friends we had together were suspicious of me now that I was a widow. I thought to myself, "I just lost Tom. Do these women actually think I want anything to do with their partners?" The next few years were filled with a lot of the good of life. It was difficult to make new friends but I did manage to cultivate a few.
I realized that I wanted to move further north because the south just wasn't the same without Tom. I wound up living in New York State for a year and a half. Then in May of 2010 I came back to live in my own country where I felt I belonged. I ended up living in a rental house a dear friend of mine owned and it still is my home.
Have I done all I wanted to do? Of course not! But then again, I have found myself having experiences I did not plan, and they were amazing! Do I have regrets? I used to but then I realized it was a foolish road to travel. Truth is if you use your time regretting, you are loosing out on the adventure. Be kind, treat others as you would like to be treated, and remember good manners, respect of others, and being unselfish is never out of fashion despite what you see in the media.
So for all of you out there in your teen's and twenties, here is my advice if any. Loosely plan things if you must, use your common sense when needed, don't deny yourself adventures, and eat at the banquet table of life with aplomb. You only have one time around in this old world, so live each day to the fullest.
So what are my conclusions regarding the golden years? Life is what you make it and if you are both smart and lucky most of it is golden. I think I was lucky more than smart, when I look back on my life. Mine had a lot of golden moments that I can look back on with pleasure. I am still living them.
I have adopted a new friend. He is a black Terrier Chihuahua mix by the name of Dobbie. Why that particular name? Well, it is no secret that the little guys always have the largest personalities. My new buddy is black and very aware that he can summon up a great deal of swagger. So I felt he had a big personality like the Doberman thus his name; Dobbie.
By the way the only place he is safe when I am cleaning is on the bed!